Life Laments (long, just written for me)

Don't worry guys. I'm still working on Annabelle's stories whenever I can.

Right now however I just need to put my thoughts down. I'm just going to write free flowing, without edits, just to get it out there.

I'm the sort who needs to vent. I usually do it by speaking to certain friends or family but sometimes it just doesn't feel right. All I know is I just have to throw up my feelings so I can hear them and help turn off the self-doubt and recriminations that flow regularly in my mind.

There are things I should put down here first.
1. I care too much about others. Their feelings, their judgments, and so on.
2. I believe without a shadow of a doubt that God is real and he talks to us with a peaceful voice that speaks to us when we're full of doubt and frustration and fear. We may not always be able to listen but their are many ways, such as prayer, meditation, scripture study, church attendance and most of all, shutting off your own head, which we can hear him.
3. I long for love. I am very grateful for the appreciation and love I get from friends and family. But I'm talking about that special someone whom I, too, can love with all my heart.
4.Sometimes we make choices that we think are right at the time but we have mislead ourselves.

Thanks to some choices I made twenty-seven years ago, I began a relationship based on one thing: a need to feel loved and appreciated. She was running from her mother and needed a support. Together we became an "us" and twenty-five years ago we were married.

But did I truly "love" her? Who knows anymore. I know the only thing about her that attracted me was her humor. I know this lack of attraction to her personality flaws (flaws in my mind and in the mind of those who knew us) grew into dissatisfaction and resentment.

I figured it was just me. I mean sure, her destructive patterns hurt us and our four children over the years but after every fight we'd patch it up and move on. We'd repeat over and over but my dad served my mother year after year with nothing but pain and hurt returned to him. At least my spouse gave me love, appreciation and respect. Well, sometimes.

But the toxicity of the marriage took it's toll. I still long to find love with someone who can love me without abusing me. Without ultimatums or absences or causing me to have to excuse toxic behavior to everyone we come in contact with.

The fights got harder and my affection died. Celebratory events such as anniversaries, Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, all became a necessary chore. How could I celebrate someone who would verbally and mentally hurt others? Who would constantly refuse to endure and would rather share self pity?

I spoke with my wife. We fought. Nothing new as the fights had increased at that point. I realized something. What I thought was love for my wife in the beginning of our relationship was only a need to find love. And while our years together have given us many wonderful memories, along with them all was her toxic behavior.

I asked her to leave and move in with her family since mine live out of state and three of the kids preferred me. They needed the house and my job was in this state so we couldn't just run to California. My wife left with my eldest daughter whom still doesn't see things the way I have explained them here.

They've been gone for over two months and now my three other kids (ages 20, 18, 16) and I finally have peace and fulfillment in almost everything. Well, the kids have it in everything. I'm still missing that which I have longed for for a very long time: the kind of love without strings or baggage. Just a mutual respect and appreciation for one another.

I feel lonely in a crowd. Meanwhile my wife takes turns pleading for what was never real, and harassing me with anger and hate. All the while slipping in various sneaky agendas to get what she wants.

The divorce will take at least three months. I have a great lawyer and it might go well, but I still get at least eight emails a day from my soon-to-be-ex. They tear me down or ask for things I know would hurt myself and the other kids if I give in.

I need, for once, to be loved.

God bless Brother Norby

One of my dear, favorite teachers from my high school years, seminary teacher Brother Richard Norby, was hurt in the Brussels Belgium terrorist attack last night.  My heart and prayers go with him.

http://mygoodreport.blogspot.com/2016/03/the-light-that-shines-in-brussels.html

And the winner is...

Laura Thomas! You win a copy of Dark Birth! I need your email so we can converse. Laura? Can you see this?

Welcome to the 6th Annual Spooktacular Giveaway Hop!

Once more it's time for the Spooktacular Giveaway Hop! Can you believe it's actually that time again?

Yup it is!

This year I'm giving you a second chance to win the first book in the Night Children series.

One lucky person who posts in the comments will get NIGHT CHILDREN: DARK BIRTH for free. 

Here's what it's about...

Annabelle and Roland’s lives changed forever after they died. Annabelle is terrified of facing Dominic, the master vampire who killed their parents. She’d rather get a stake to the heart than fight him but a confrontation is inevitable. Roland is thirsty for the battle, longing for revenge. They train to survive Dominic and waves of his loyal werewolves, vampires, sasquatches and dark witches.

As if their new undead lives weren't complicated enough, they must rescue a real witch from the Salem Witch Trials and dodge lethal attacks from a cruel monster hunter.

They have a short season to master their new abilities, including transforming into bats and mesmerizing others, before Dominic and his dark warriors launch their final, devastating attack. 

Sounds great? Well then comment below!

And don't forget to check out these many mighty hoppers too!

Life, don't talk to me about life

Actually it's pretty good. I'm working at a great job with benefits, all is well with my family, and I'm hard at work on book 3 of the Night Children series.

But GAH! I haven't posted in over a year!

Sorry folks. I'll do better.

Here's a pic...

Welcome to the 5th Annual Spooktacular Giveaway Hop!

Hey there! Once again I'm part of the Spooktacular Giveaway Hop! hosted by I Am A Reader, Not A Writer. 

And what am I giving away? 

Hmmm... Maybe I'll give away free witch visits to your house?

Nawww. That's pretty raciest or something.

How about a pet werewolf?

Nope. They shed.

I know! An autograph photo from Dracula!

No. He's got better things to do.

I KNOW! Why don't I throw all those things in to one FREE gift? A book!

One lucky person who posts in the comments will get NIGHT CHILDREN: DARK BIRTH for free. 

Here's what it's about...

Annabelle and Roland’s lives changed forever after they died. Annabelle is terrified of facing Dominic, the master vampire who killed their parents. She’d rather get a stake to the heart than fight him but a confrontation is inevitable. Roland is thirsty for the battle, longing for revenge. They train to survive Dominic and waves of his loyal werewolves, vampires, sasquatches and dark witches.

As if their new undead lives weren't complicated enough, they must rescue a real witch from the Salem Witch Trials and dodge lethal attacks from a cruel monster hunter.

They have a short season to master their new abilities, including transforming into bats and mesmerizing others, before Dominic and his dark warriors launch their final, devastating attack. 

Sounds great? Well then comment below!

And don't forget to check out these many mighty hoppers too!

I'm now on Wattpad

Wattpad is a place where you can sample chapters of books for free!
Come check out Dark Birth Chapter 1 out this week and I'll be posting each chapter each week!

5th Annual Children’s Book Festival with me!

Don't forget! I'll be at the 5th Annual Children’s Book Festival Program this Saturday the 27th from 10:am to 2:pm. It will be at the Community Learning Center in Tooele.

Come join the fun!

Book Two Has a cover!

Feast your eyes on the cover of NIGHT CHILDREN: DARK CHANGES! I bought the flag image from Shutterstock.com. The artist is known by the handle BeRad. I needed help formatting it and Shanda Maple, a fellow employee at my day job, helped me out.

Dark Changes has been uploaded to Createspace and a proof of the paperback version has been ordered so I can show it at the Children's Book Fair. 

My critique group is going over it for a last look, and I'm not quite happy with the back cover blurb, so there will be some tweaking before I officially release it next month.

Watch this space for more information!

13 BOOKS!

A BIG thank you to my daughter Sara for an amazing idea! I now know what happened with my cast of undead heroes during the moon landing in 1969! 
It will become book 12, DARK ECLIPSE! That combined with my 1950's style DARK INVASION means a total of THIRTEEN Annabelle books! Perfect spooky number!

Book One: Dark Birth
Book Two: Dark Changes
Book Three: Dark Quest
Book Four: Dark Revolution
Book Five: Dark Wilderness
Book Six: Dark Exodus
Book Seven: Dark Betrayal
Book Eight: Dark Frontier
Book Nine: Dark Experiment
Book Ten: Dark War
Book Eleven: Dark Invasion
Book Twelve: Dark Eclipse
Book Thirteen: Dark Cataclysm

Can't wait to write it all! Dark Changes is coming very soon. Working on Dark Quest now.
So excited!

The Watchers Book 1 Knight of Light Book Trailer

Check out Deirdra Eden's The Watchers: Knight of Light.

Here is a little discription:

In England, 1270 A.D., Auriella (pronounced yurr-ee-ella) flees her village after being accused of witchcraft. Pursued by nightmarish creatures, she struggles to accept the truth about her dangerous powers.

Marketing in Your Pajamas by by Rachelle Christensen & Sabine Berlin

Thought I'd drop a link to this piece of wonderful advice from Rachelle Christensen and Sabine Berlin here. That way I can come back and use it.

Marketing in your pajamas

Now I just need to use it!

Robin Williams Tribute

Sharing one more thing about Robin

Silence about my books?

So why have I posting nothing about my writing efforts lately? Simple. I've been busy writing! I've reformatted Myths and Multi-Mart to a paperback publishing format with active table of contents. I wrote more on Myths, then wrote more on Multi-Mart. I keep getting inspired for one while I'm working on the other. GAHH!

Also, I have received mark ups on the Prologue for Book Two (Dark Changes) and received mark ups for several chapters from the same book from my daughter. I've made the necessary edits and cut more fat from the book.  

I've also reviewed others' work for the crit group.

So overall I've been pretty successful with my time. More info to come!

The Best Robin Williams Moments

RIP

My favorite actor. You will be missed.

Thank you for all you have given us.

You have been and always will be an inspiration to me. Your levity in times of crisis, the way you look at the silly side of life.

This one was very hard for me to take.

I'll be at the Children's Book Festival in Tooele!

I've been invited to attend the Children's Book Festival in Tooele!

Here is their website:

Tooele Children's Book Festival

It will be held at the Community Learning Center on the 27th of September, 2014.

If you're local and can make it, please do! I'll have copies of DARK THREATS and DARK BIRTH and if I'm able, maybe DARK CHANGES as well.

Tooele Writers Meet and Greet

We had a great Meet and Greet yesterday!
Tooele Writers Meet and Greet

I chatted with several fellow authors like Emma Penrod, Celeste Hansen, Karen Hoover, Roseanne Wilkins and Lucien Maier. I met with a few people who want to join our group and some who were looking for something to read.

I also joined a critique group!

It's great being back in the thick of things!

Shout Out to my fellow Tooele Writers!

Meet Authors of Tooele County

Yup, that's right. If you live locally or just want to come all the way to my home town, we're hosting a Meet and Greet night this Friday!

Come say "Hi"!

Daddy/Davie Day @ Lagoon!

Went to Lagoon Amusement Park with my son, David Bryan, as a Daddy/Davie Day. Had a great time! Rode lots of rides and spent a lot of time at Lagoona Beach.

Unfortunately we had a lot of sun and I didn't use the lotion as well as I could so we have Lobster-Dave! Ah well. Tomorrow we rest.

Where are the rest of the family? My sweetheart Janeen Bryan took Laura Bryan to visit Snow College and Katelyn Bryan to visit Southern Utah University. Sara Bryan went along too for a girl's road trip! We miss them!

Anyway, that's what's going on right now!

My son, David

And the beat keeps going...

Thought I'd drop a few words to update you on how things are going with my writing.

Right now NIGHT CHILDREN: DARK CHANGES (Book 2 of my Annabelle series) is with various beta readers. I hope to get it back before the new School year starts and I hope the changes are too extensive. I don't think they will be, but I'm too close to the project and I've been wrong many times before.

Still, if the changes are not too bad, I can complete them on time for my goal; to publish it on Amazon in September in time for Annabelle's 10th anniversary!

Meanwhile, I've been plugging away at MYTHS: THE FARNALLA TOME. I ran into some troubles but I think I have a handle on it.

Anyway, that's where things are at.

More info later.