They Felt Doubt Too

Originally posted on 7/19/09 for the Charge of the Write Brigade.


Hey there gentle beings. The name is Jack Roberts and I’ve decided to join the merry band of literary champions, the Write Brigade. It’s true that I come to you with limited experience but in my struggle to catch the dream, I’ve learned a thing or two. In fact I’m still learning.

This lesson becomes abundantly clear to me every time I read through my writing. Just last Thursday, in fact, I discovered something on the World Wide Web that made me want to duct tape my hands in oven mitts and chain them behind my back so I'll never make a fool of myself again.

I discovered a post where I reviewed the seventh Harry Potter book. Apparently overcome with excitement, I typed a long winded essay. I told of my personal history with the series, examined various characters and practically filled every sentence with overjoyed hyperbole.

After reading the post with fresh eyes I felt embarrassed. Why didn’t I wait a couple years before I posted it? Sure, I’m over reacting, but the very thought of something that over-the-top can be connected to me just sent shivers up my spine.

With my past sins still fresh on my thoughts I continued with my daily activities. Among those tasks was the purchase of movie tickets. As I drove around the theatre, aware of a line that would make a DMV employee feel at home, sudden realization smacked me upside the head.

Many want to see this movie because of their love of the book. A close bond that author created by simply choosing to weave the best story she could. She had to have doubts in her writing abilities. I know she had rejections. What if she quit when faced her mistakes?

I count the minutes until I see the latest Harry Potter movie and reflect to where I was when I read it. I remember finishing that book in a bathroom stall located on the same floor of the hospital my son slept in. He slept deeply, the latest in a chain of plastic surgeries a success. With my wife in the chair beside his bed, I was safe in the knowledge that he’d be OK. So I crept to the bathroom (because I didn’t want to disturb anyone) and delve into the remaining chapters of HP 6. What feelings I experienced! I couldn’t get enough. A writer with fears and insecurities worked hard despite them and created something that gave me that lasting memory.

If we as writers gave up every time we discovered a mistake, life would be void of entertainment. What do you do? You take a deep breath, realize others have been there before, and jump right back in. Simplistic? Sure, but it works.

Thanks for reading.